


Messiah

by VampireHydeFTW



Category: MEJIBRAY
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-20
Updated: 2016-07-20
Packaged: 2018-07-25 17:13:09
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7541122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VampireHydeFTW/pseuds/VampireHydeFTW
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A soldier's life was one of order and routine. A way to hold back the Chaos and live a happy and fulfilling life. That was the only life the soldier had ever known and he felt no need to change it. He was loyal to the country that kept the order, and so really it should have been no big deal when he was invited in to the Chaos.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Messiah

**Author's Note:**

> This story is written for the Summer contest on the livejournal community: jrockyaoi. My chosen video for inspiration is "Messiah" by Mejibray and the story is inspired by both the setting of the video and the lyrics of the song. Most of the outfits worn in this story are taken from the video, though both Koichi and MiA do wear other clothes within the story.

In all of his twenty plus years MiA had never met a man quite like the one before him now and he couldn't help but feel uncomfortable caught in his gaze. Nervously he straightened out his military uniform, glad that it was his commanding officer who would be talking to this young lord.

“You need to tell us your name,” the officer repeated to the young man who ignored him once again. Objectively MiA decided the lord was pretty, in a garish kind of way. He had handsome features at least, though must he flaunt the devil tattoos on his arm? Surely that was just inviting in trouble.

“Who are you?” the lord asked, actually pointing right at him. Did this lord not know that pointing was rude? It appeared not, as the lord was clearly more concerned with repositioning the long blond strands of hair that grew from shorter cut raven locks.

“Officer M14-A22, Sir,” MiA replied automatically. He had no official name, though he did answer to MiA when among friends. He'd been born into the military system that controlled Japan, knew nothing but the laws and order the elders had taught him. To see someone living so clearly out of the system terrified him, but at the same time it entranced him.

“That's not a name,” the lord replied, “It's like you have no personality or will of your own! Shame, you have such a pretty face, just like a doll.”

“Enough,” the commanding officer interrupted, “We are here on orders of the Supreme Emperor, you will answer our questions.”

“Or?” the lord asked, finally turning his attention to the commanding office. “What will happen if I don't share?”

“We will have no choice but to relieve you of your land and title,” the commanding officer replied, “As ordered by the Supreme Emperor.”

“Well that's no fun,” the lord reflected, “Very well, my name is Tsuzuku and this is my home.”

“Yes, very decadent,” the commanding officer replied with scorn. Men lived simply now, even those in the highest positions, but Tsuzuku's home could only be described as a palace. It was beautiful, MiA reflected, actually feeling rather envious. What was this emotion doing here? Why would he want to live so far removed from the teachings? Order was the way, without it all that remained was Chaos. Still, the chandelier was pretty to look at.

“What do you think?” Tsuzuku asked, turning his attention straight back to MiA.

“It's pretty,” MiA admitted, nervous as his commanding office turned his gaze on him, “But luxury leads to excess, excess to greed, greed to the Chaos that ends us all.”

“Darling, this is already the end,” Tsuzuku replied, “Men without voices, without freedom, living with no will of their own. You can take your order and I'll embrace Chaos.”

“You're mad!” MiA accused. Who in their right mind embraced the Chaos?

“Insanity is the only sanity in this crazy world,” Tsuzuku answered, turning his attention to the commanding officer once more. “Now tell me, why has the Supreme Emperor sent you here? I cause no trouble, I pay my taxes and my people do the same.”

“We are here to investigate the nature of this palace,” the officer replied.

“You mean the Doll House?” Tsuzuku asked. “Let me save you some time. This isn't a brothel as the rumours may claim. I'm not leading a cult, or hiding a revolutionary militia. It's true that they call me ‘The Messiah’, but that's nothing more than a nickname. Still, if you don't believe me I will happily accept this one into my home.”

“What's so special about M14-A22?” the commanding officer asked, surprised by the offer but clearly willing to accept it. MiA was a trusted soldier and it would only take one to unveil the true nature of Tsuzuku's home.

“Just look at him,” Tsuzuku replied, laughing when the commanding officer still looked confused. “He's beautiful, he'll fit in perfectly here.”

 

“Officer!” a happy young man greeted MiA as he stepped into the grounds of the palace for the second time that day. He'd gone back to collect some overnight things and change into his casual clothes; a pale blue shirt and smart black trousers. Admittedly, he kind of wished he had never returned. The palace scared him and Tsuzuku scared him even more. This was a house of heathens and the quicker he exposed them, the quicker he could go back home.

“My name is MiA-A22,” MiA introduced himself with a formal salute, “MiA for short.”

“You're not short, you're taller than me!” the man teased. Hiding his disgust at the man's antics, he gave the stranger a quick once over. Pink hair, really? It was worse than Tsuzuku's messy black and blond. “I'm Koichi, The Messiah has asked me to be your guide. Ask me anything.”

“What's going on here?” MiA asked, half convinced this man would be foolish enough to tell him.

“It's a secret!” Koichi replied with delight.

“Welcome to Chaos,” MiA muttered as he followed Koichi through the gardens and into the grand house. Only a fool would enter here willingly. Really, he should turn and run screaming for his home, but he had his orders.

“Hurry up MiA,” Koichi complained, “We don't have long to get ready for dinner.”

“It's not even four,” MiA replied, “And surely what I'm wearing now is smart enough? If you go formal, I'm afraid I don't have anything.”

“You didn't bring much, did you?” Koichi asked, for the first time noticing all MiA was carrying was a small bag. “Where is everything?”

“This is everything,” MiA replied, “Toothbrush, toothpaste, shampoo that doubles as shower gel, a change of shirt and trousers and three days worth of underwear.”

“Three days?” Koichi asked horrified, “No, I won't hear it! You're staying here longer than that! You'll just have to borrow some things, we don't mind.”

“Three days is long enough,” MiA answered firmly, ignoring the pitiful look the pink haired man was now wearing.

“We need to get ready for dinner,” Koichi eventually said as his sulking failed to change MiA's mind. “This is your room, I'll be back as soon as I find you something decent to wear.”

“Thank you for taking care of me,” MiA answered politely, bowing slightly and entering a room twice as large as the one he normally shared with three other men. The bed alone was big enough for four, but it was the huge windows overlooking the garden that drew him over. The house was spectacular, but it took more than obsessive wealth to distract him from his cause.

“Only me!” Koichi called as he pushed open the door and dumped his pile of clothes on the bed. “Lucky for you I found you loads to choose from.”

“I can see that,” MiA replied, “But what's wrong with what I'm wearing?”

“It's boring,” Koichi answered, “It's not who you are, what you represent. A look so plain doesn't belong here.”

“Maybe I am boring and plain?” MiA suggested, hurt by Koichi's words. He had thought he looked nice and the clothes had come from high end designers.

“Perhaps you are,” Koichi said, his smile fading for the first time since they had met. “Perhaps you have no interests, no sense of self, perhaps you're already lost. Whatever, get dressed for dinner or don't. I need to get ready myself.”

 

It had taken him some time to even look at the clothes, and even longer to decide what to wear. How was he supposed to know who he was? He'd never been asked before and now that he had, he felt uneasy. He knew what he had on the outside at least, and for the first time he was going to flaunt it. If Koichi wanted wild and crazy, that was exactly how he was going to dress.

The black shorts fit him well, showing off his long hairless legs and smooth thighs. The black top flashed an inch of stomach, the jacket gave him the sense of uniform that he had lost the moment he had gotten into the borrowed clothes. Tsuzuku had made it clear he had been selected for his looks, so flaunting them was probably what they wanted. He was more than half convinced that he was in the middle of a whore house.

A knock on the door signalled Koichi's return, the pretty man now wearing a tight corset over his upper half and black shorts of his own. It was the platform shoes that scared him, but to his relief the boots Koichi was bringing to him were without a heel.

“Oh good, I was worried your outfit might not go with these,” Koichi said as MiA tentatively took the boots from him. Hadn't they been arguing less than an hour before?

“How did you know I'd even change?” MiA asked.

“I didn't,” Koichi admitted, “But I was hoping. You look gorgeous by the way, like chocolate I could lick you right up.”

“Lick?” MiA repeated uneasily. Another point in the whore house theory.

“Oh yes,” Koichi practically purred, “And you'd enjoy every minute of my tongue running over your endless expanse of smooth skin. I'd take my time devouring you to a symphony of moans.”

“Please don't,” MiA whispered, fear of this strange man making him back away. He'd enjoy what Koichi was offering, but what was being offered was pure indulgence and therefore a sin. Nervously he returned Koichi's calculating gaze, mentally rehearsing the self defence moves he might need to use to keep him off.

“We don't want to be late for dinner,” Koichi agreed, “So much work still to do.”

“I got dressed,” MiA protested, “What more do you want from me?”

“We need to do your hair and make-up,” Koichi answered, “Don't worry, I can get you a wig to cover up that military haircut. Long hair will suit you so much better, don't you think?”

 

Staring into the mirror, he felt a rush of excitement and a reckless abandon. The long hair softened his angular features perfectly, the blue contact lenses and expertly applied eye liner did wonders for his eyes, and the outfit enhanced all of his better features. He didn't look like a soldier and he didn't entirely feel like one either.

“Well?” Koichi asked, “What do you think.?”

“That I'm totally lickable,” MiA answered, laughing as Koichi stared at him in shock. When was the last time he had laughed? Was it bad that he didn't remember? “That's what you want to do to me?”

“It's what we all want to do to you,” Koichi replied, “Don't be scared, I'll protect you.”

“Everyone wants a piece of me?” MiA worried, “Really?”

“Not in a bad way,” Koichi reassured him, “All I meant is that Tsuzuku's description of you was so flattering that everyone is interested. They'll all think you're hot, because you are. Has nobody ever told you that you were sexy before?”

“Lust is an unnecessary emotion,” MiA replied, the soldier in him responding to the question before he could even think. “Sex is no longer necessary for the species, love distracts a soldier from his duty. Lust is natural, but an emotion you deal with in your own time. Alone.”

“Yes, I know,” Koichi said with a frown, “That's not how we live here. We laugh together, we flirt and yes we do end up in bed together.”

“So it's a whore house,” MiA finished.

“No!” Koichi snapped, “Nothing done here is for money or favours. That's not what this house is about.”

“Then what is it?” MiA demanded, infuriated that Koichi still wouldn't tell.

“You're not ready to hear,” Koichi answered, “Come on, we can't keep The Messiah waiting.”

“I guess not,” MiA replied as he followed Koichi into the hall outside. To his surprise someone had put a life size doll on the sofa outside and he found himself staring. The doll was as beautiful as it was creepy and he wasn't entirely sure how to react.

“Meto!” Koichi whined, “Don't stalk our guest.”

“I was waiting for him!” Meto objected, startling MiA as he realised the doll was in fact a man. Nothing here was quite like it seemed, he realised. Chaos made no sense. That was why there must be order. “You're the one who pretended to be his guide just to enter his room.”

“I did the job, I get the title,” Koichi objected, smiling sheepishly in MiA's direction. “I helped you out didn't I?”

“You showed me around,” MiA replied tactfully, amused more than offended by Koichi's antics. He'd already figured that Koichi was hanging around him far more than he should. He also thought he knew why, though it flattered his ego to believe a man had a crush on him. Affection wasn't something he was used to, but from Koichi it was becoming something that he liked.

“See,” Koichi replied, sticking his tongue out at Meto, “So don't be so mean.”

“I'm not being mean,” Meto replied as he stood up and turned his attention to MiA, “Would you like to come to a tea party tomorrow?”

“I guess?” MiA replied carefully. Perhaps Meto would tell him what Koichi would not.

“We'd love to!” Koichi replied, taking MiA's arm in his own.

“I wasn't inviting you!” Meto protested, his words falling on deaf ears. Invited or not it seemed Koichi would be coming.

 

There were perhaps twenty people sat around the long banquet table and everyone had turned to give him a once over when he entered the room. They really did all want him, MiA thought with wary delight. He'd never felt desirable before and hadn't quite figured out how he should react.

Perhaps he had wanted the attention, he thought as he took his seat beside Tsuzuku. The Messiah hadn't hidden his wandering gaze, just like he hadn't attempted to dress at all modestly. He'd gone wild in his freedom and didn't regret it.

“I see Koichi dressed you,” Tsuzuku remarked as the pink haired man took the seat to MiA's right. “It suits you.”

“He helped, but I chose the clothes myself,” MiA admitted, silence following his words. Had nobody here thought he was capable of choosing his own clothes? He supposed he hadn't once given the impression that he would be someone to embrace Chaos. He wasn't that kind of man, not at all, but he had still decided to try it.

“Even better,” Tsuzuku eventually said, breaking the silence just as the food began to arrive. Used to having his rations on a pre-made tray, it was shocking to see the food placed in the centre of the table. Were they really to just help themselves? What of the correct nutritional proportions and serving sizes?

He'd just decided someone must come to serve the food when Tsuzuku began to place food on his own plate. The Messiah's actions were all his followers were waiting for and rather reluctantly MiA began to serve himself.

Fifty percent vegetables, MiA reminded himself as he carefully filled up his plate. Was he getting the vitamin levels right? How much protein was the right amount? He thought he hadn't done too bad, but as a server filled his glass with red wine he realised he had overlooked the drinks entirely.

Alcohol was poison, numbing the senses and bringing in the Chaos. He didn't want the wine at all. In fact its presence scared him. What would happen if he drank it? What would happen to those around him? He'd never seen a drunk person before and he didn't want to.

“It's not so bad,” Koichi whispered quietly, “One glass won't do anything at all, but nobody is making you drink it.”

Rather taken by surprise at Koichi's thoughtful remarks, he decided to brave the wine. One glass would do nothing, he though as he took a tiny sip. It tasted good, for a poison. Why had Koichi been so considerate? He really hadn't expected the other man to even understand what he was feeling. Clearly he hadn't given Koichi enough credit. How had he even known of his aversion of alcohol? Only the military and police refrained from drinking as it was one of the small acts of Chaos the general population were still able to embrace.

As he had always done, MiA started with the vegetables, not even thinking about what he was doing as it was such a habit. The food was good, fresher than he was used to, but this wasn't a surprise. The people in this home were used to living in luxury, why would the food be any different?

“Well if you're not going to eat it,” Koichi warned as he helped himself to some of the meat on MiA's place. Shocked, it took him a moment to react. Staring at the space on his plate where the meat had been and then over at Koichi's mocking smile.

“That was mine,” MiA eventually said, “I was going to eat it. Vegetables, meat then carbohydrates is best for digestion, or so the health minister tells us.”

“There's more on the serving plate,” Koichi said with a shrug.

“Then why didn't you take it from there?” MiA complained, doing his best to replace the exact amount of meat Koichi had taken.

“But it tastes better from your plate,” Koichi said as he stole food again. Annoyed, MiA returned the favour and stole from the pink haired man's plate, uneasy when he realised this was the reaction Koichi had been waiting for.

“It's best to devour your food when you sit next to him,” Tsuzuku teased, clearly amused by the situation. Amused and pleased. He'd broken order MiA realised and in doing so invited in Chaos. For the rest of the meal he was careful to eat in the orderly fashion he was used to. Wordlessly replacing food that was stolen until he was no longer sure if he had eaten the balanced meal he had originally planned.

When the desert was laid out before them, he couldn't help but feel uneasy at the endless sugar filled treats. He wanted fruit, but with the exception of cheesecake it didn't seem to be an option. Beside him though, Koichi's eyes were lighting up in delight. The pink haired man was clearly in heaven and MiA wished he could share just a little of his enthusiasm.

“This is what you want,” Koichi suggested as he offered MiA a slice of chocolate cake. “You just don't know how good it is yet.”

“A soldier needs to take care of his body,” MiA protested. Really this was decadence at its worst. Yet when Koichi's smile faded, he wondered if he had actually hurt him by refusing. What was one slice of cake in a lifetime of careful eating? “Go on then, if it means so much to you.”

“It does,” Koichi agreed. “I won't even steal it.”

“Don't believe him,” Tsuzuku warned, quiet through the meal though he had been watching MiA carefully. “Koichi always goes wild when there's chocolate involved.”

“That's not true!” Koichi complained, “Besides, you want Chaos.”

“When it benefits,” Tsuzuku replied, “You see MiA, as much as I love Chaos I don't want people to get hurt.”

“Then why embrace Chaos at all?” MiA wondered out loud. “I don't understand.”

“Don't you?” Tsuzuku asked, “Chaos is freedom, expression and creativity. Order strips a person of who they truly are. Every soldier acts the same without even realising. When you wake up you make your bed, brush your teeth and then get dressed. Always in that order. You eat the meals that are given without questioning or favouring one food over another. Order is routine and it turns men into machines.”

“You're wrong,” MiA protested, “Order is routine and rules, I agree with you there, but it makes us better for it. Before order there was obesity, violence and other crimes, people without education starving and pointless wars. They lived in Chaos.”

“If order removed wars, why are there soldiers?” Tsuzuku asked, “Order is control, nothing more. Who's pulling your strings?”

“Nobody, I embrace order on my own,” MiA objected, turning his attention to his plate where he was convinced a large part of his cake had vanished. Koichi, he thought with a sigh. Only Koichi didn't look smug. If anything, he had an expression of a hopeful parent waiting for their child to final grasp a concept that had been alluding them for some time.

 

They retreated to what Tsuzuku called his games room after dinner. It was a large room featuring a pool table, dartboard and a variety of game ~~s~~ consoles in a corner. Ignoring all of the toys, for all games were toys to MiA, Tsuzuku led MiA to a quiet corner where they sat on a sofa to talk.

“What do you do in your free time?” Tsuzuku asked, their disagreement from earlier clearly forgotten for now.

“I play guitar,” MiA answered easily. Free time was used for self improvement. If you weren't learning, you were wasting away. “I love music.”

“Isn't music Chaos?” Tsuzuku asked, “I love it too.”

“It's notes set in orders you play over and over again,” MiA answered, “How is that Chaos?”

“I suppose,” Tsuzuku replied, “And yet it's creative. Don't you ever try to make your own?”

“Yes,” MiA replied, “I write music.”

“And they let you do that?” Tsuzuku asked, “Play music other than what the government has already sanctioned as acceptable?”

“It's creativity in a positive form,” MiA tried to explain, “It brings order to the Chaos and a little creativity is encouraged in any soldier expected to advance through the ranks.”

“I see,” Tsuzuku replied thoughtfully, “Whatever the reason behind it, I'm glad you have creativity in you. I knew I saw something when I looked at you.”  
“What, more than a pretty face?” MiA found himself teasing, “What am I to you? Some object to be admired for awhile?”

“Is that why you dressed so provocatively?” Tsuzuku teased, “You chose to look so sexy, so don't complain when people flirt with you.”

“Who says I'm complaining?” MiA asked with a smile, “To understand Chaos I thought it was best to embrace it.”

 

MiA could hardly believe his actions of the night before. He'd been flirting with Tsuzuku and Koichi both and wished he could blame the wine. He'd only had half a glass, his actions were his own but he didn't quite understand them.

He wanted attention, he knew that much, but from who and why? He'd always been content with his life as it was. Hadn't he? He thought he had, but he was beginning to think something had been missing. Last night he’d had fun and he couldn't deny it. More importantly he didn't want to regret it. The Chaos was slipping through and it terrified him for he was embracing it.

He dressed a little more sombrely that morning, all black and covering up his body instead of flaunting it. He looked good but as he knocked on Koichi's door and was let in, he could see that Koichi was disappointed in his appearance yet again.

“You can't wear that,” Koichi said, “Not to one of Meto's picnics.”

“I thought Chaos was about doing as you will,” MiA complained, “There's a lot of rules to all of this.”

“You should like rules,” Koichi replied as he began to search through his clothes for something for MiA to wear.

“When I know what they are,” MiA answered as a dress was tossed in his direction. Seriously? Swearing silently that Meto must be some kind of pervert, he dressed quickly, not at all surprised to see Koichi checking out his body as he did so. Whatever, let him look. In the army it was normal to get changed in front of other men and he really didn't care if Koichi liked what he saw.

“Let me do your make-up,” Koichi offered and willingly MiA sat down at the dressing table. He was just embracing Chaos to understand it, he reminded himself. The commanding officer didn't need to know how much he was enjoying it.

“I have a tiara somewhere,” Koichi offered as he finished. Pulling open drawers, he located it, but it was another piece of metal that caught MiA's attention. A dog tag was half hidden beneath the other items, just like the army issued the one he wore around his neck. He couldn't read it all, but he saw enough of the numbers to understand.

“K01-Z,” he read out loud, “You're him. The missing soldier.”

“Is that what they told you?” Koichi asked, “I didn't go missing, I quit.”

“You were sent here before me, to uncover what's going on,” MiA accused, “Only you didn't want to leave.”

“The army weren't happy with me, but making me stay was a liability so in the end they let me go,” Koichi explained, “I fulfilled my last mission. I understood everything. The Messiah led me into Chaos and I hope I never have to leave.”

“That's insanity,” MiA protested, worried by just how much Koichi's actions were beginning to make sense. There was just something about Chaos that made him want to embrace it with open arms.

“Is it?” Koichi asked, “Come on, Meto will be waiting.”

 

Koichi's words were still echoing around his mind when they walked through the gardens. He didn't want to believe that Chaos was better than order, but everything he was seeing was making him question what he knew. Order was control, as Tsuzuku had warned and Chaos could be fun when combined with limited rules, just like Koichi had shown him. His heart was opening up to Chaos and so when he saw the teddy bear’s picnic laid out before him he could only smile.

Koichi had dressed the two of them like dolls, Meto was a teddy bear and they were joined by real toys. It was Chaos in its extremity but he only sat down on the blanket and accepted the tea that was offered to him. There was no fighting this, once again he might as well go along with the flow.

“What do you think?” Koichi asked, using a teddy bear to speak on his behalf.

“Honestly?” MiA asked, “This is a game for children. I haven't played with teddy bears since I was very young.”

“Mine was a red one, I named her Ichigo.” Koichi remembered. Every child born to the orphanage was gifted a single teddy bear when they were born. Red, yellow, green or blue. Those were the only options.

“Sora, he was blue,” MiA remembered fondly. “I took him everywhere, until I was too old.”

“How old were you, when they took your toys?” Meto asked. He was making a point, but what it was, MiA wasn't sure.

“Five,” he answered in unison with Koichi. At five you started school and were considered too old for games.

“I was eight when my childhood was stolen,” Meto answered, “So I'm taking it back now as an adult.” So that was what this was about? Reclaiming your lost youth? Nervously MiA picked up a blue teddy bear, much like his beloved Sora, and looked at it sadly. He'd cried on his fifth birthday when his toy was taken. It had felt like Sora was being stolen and when he glanced at his companions he knew they had felt the same way.

“They take our toys too young,” he found himself saying, surprised by the anger and pain in his voice. “I was just a child, Sora brought no harm and yet they took him anyway.”

“MiA?” Koichi asked as the soldier got up to leave.

“I need time to myself,” MiA answered, “Please don't follow me.”

“Come find me if you need me,” Koichi replied, “I'll be with Meto here or in my room.”

“Thanks,” MiA said and he genuinely meant it.

 

At the beginning of the fourth day MiA carefully put on his uniform, making sure everything was just right. He had to give the right impression to his commanding officer when he returned. Had to look his best.

Once satisfied, he left the room, smiling at Koichi outside. The pink haired man seemed surprised by his choice but didn't argue with him over it. Smiling sadly, Koichi offered him a hug, supporting words and a gentle kiss on the cheek.

With a breaking heart he headed outside, leaving through the grand gates and finding the commanding officer right outside. It was clear that the commanding officer wasn't happy with him, but that was just too bad. He'd made his decision and nobody was going to change it.

“Explain yourself,” the commanding officer barked at him. So he didn't like the tiny shorts and glittering cap? MiA could only pity him in his ignorance. He'd been that way once, believing Chaos was insanity when in reality, it was the rest of the world that was insane. The Messiah had shown him the way, but more importantly Koichi had been his guide.

“Officer Mi4-A22 reporting for duty,” MiA announced firmly and for the last time. “You sent me to check on Lord Tsuzuku and I report that he is doing no wrong. Nothing illegal or dangerous is happening in that home.”

“It's a bloody cult, that's what it is!” the commanding officer snapped, “They got to you, didn't they Mi4-A22?”

“They opened my eyes,” MiA answered as he handed over a written letter, “My resignation sir.”

“You're leaving us?” the commanding officer demanded. “You were to advance through the ranks quickly. Your promotion was set for next month. Why quit for this madness?”

“Is it madness to think for yourself, or to do as told?” MiA asked, “Is it madness to want to enjoy life before it ends, or perhaps to follow endless self improvement that still ends in your own death? Is it insanity to stand out, or to dress like everyone else? I know what I believe.”

“Brain washed!” the commanding officer replied, shocked at having lost one of his better officers.

“But by who I wonder?” MiA asked as he turned around to go back inside. He kept his head up, his posture strong, but once he entered his bedroom he began to shake in fear. What had he done? Was he destroying his entire life on a whim? Sadly he picked up the sky blue bear from his pillow and stared into its dark eyes. His childhood had been stolen, he reminded himself, it was time to start all over again.

Maybe ten minutes later a quiet knock on the door signalled Koichi's arrival and he let the other in, ~~.~~ knowing that, as much as he needed to be alone, he needed Koichi's presence more. For once Koichi stayed quiet, joining him on the bed and holding him gently.

“How did you cope?” MiA asked. The only man who had ever gone through what he was going through was the one lying right here.

“At first, not well,” Koichi admitted. “It's not easy to learn everything you were taught was a lie. It got easier but there will always be a part of me that thrives on order and rules.”  
“Order and rules?” They weren't words he would use to describe Koichi.

“Every morning I make my bed before brushing my teeth,” Koichi admitted, “My routine never changed once. I keep my shoes in organised pairs, my books in alphabetical order and everything I own has a home. I may act wild and free, but when the Chaos gets too much I turn to my organised room and I feel calm once more.”

“It's about balance,” MiA said, “That's why Tsuzuku has his rules, like how dinner is always at the same time every night?”

“There's no right and wrong unless your actions hurt someone else,” Koichi replied, “But I want to do something that might just upset you. I don't know if I should. Would you mind if I finally did what I suggested on our first night?”

“I don't know what you mean,” MiA confessed, figuring it out when Koichi's lips met his. He'd been described as lickable that night, when Koichi had flirted with him in his room. He'd been horrified that it might happen, but now he realised he wouldn't actually mind. If it was Koichi's mouth on his skin he would enjoy it.

“You're so hard to resist,” Koichi complained, “I told myself I had to give you space, that you wouldn't be here to stay. I worry you prefer Tsuzuku, you flirt with the both of us.”

“I'm sorry,” MiA found himself apologising, “I'm still learning the rules.”

“Liar,” Koichi scolded, “You flirt with him to make me jealous. Don't think I don't notice such things.”

“Well, maybe,” MiA confessed as he wrapped his arms around Koichi. “You're the one I want.”

“Good, because I'm what you've got,” Koichi said as he finally got to lick the smooth skin on MiA's neck. “You smell so good.”

“You really meant it then,” MiA said, smiling as Koichi's mouth worshipped his neck. Not words meant to scare or shock him. A promise that they could both enjoy. Quite content to just lie here he ran his fingers over Koichi's long, soft hair, surprised to find the slight rise where the extensions were joined. He'd only been missing a couple of years, of course his hair hadn't had the chance to grow this long on its own.

Placing his cap on Koichi's head he tried to imagine the other as a soldier but found he couldn't. Koichi was just Koichi, there were no labels to describe him other than that. Koichi was enough and suited him perfectly, though like MiA it was a name simply taken from his government coding. Born without a name, he'd been so blind to think that was normal.

“What are you thinking about?” Koichi teased as he caught MiA's expression.

“You,” MiA admitted, “I just can't picture you as a nameless man.”

“Silly,” Koichi said as he placed the cap to one side, “That's because I have a personality now. Nameless men are all the same.”

“Almost all of them,” MiA agreed as he pulled Koichi's lips back towards his own. This was what he wanted; the comfort that erased the pain of rebirth. The feel of a beautiful, intelligent, kind man lying beside him and knowing that this man worshipped him equally in return.

“Thank the Messiah,” Koichi whispered under his breath as his fingers slowly pulled down the zip that held MiA's top together.

“What for?” MiA asked. He'd ruled this out as being a cult, but not entirely.

“For bringing you to me,” Koichi answered, “Without his influence we would have never met.”

“Then thank the Messiah,” MiA agreed as Koichi's tongue licked over his nipple, “But thank you even more.”

“Thank me later,” Koichi suggested, something MiA was sure he probably would be doing. He knew where this was going, he was no fool, and he didn't protest against it. The belief that sexual desire could only be dealt with alone was one he was more than happy to let go.

Pulling himself up into a sitting position he happily let Koichi straddle his lap, insisting only that Koichi let him remove his striped coat and mid-drift exposing top before they kissed again. It felt so good to be with someone else like this. Perhaps it was all he had ever wanted. All he had ever desired.

Gently pushing Koichi onto the bed beside him, he moved his own lips onto the other's chest, slowly working down until his tongue was gently caressing the Roman numeral tattoos. He traced the shapes as his mind wondered what they could possibly mean.

“My birthday,” Koichi said simply when MiA asked, “And the date I became your missing soldier.”

“We're missing together,” MiA promised as his gaze moved lower. He'd never made love to a man before, didn't know how to begin. Brushing away his concerns he moved his lips up Koichi's body again, settling them back on Koichi's own.

“Just give me a minute,” Koichi said as he removed himself from the bed. Shyly MiA watched him go, slipping off his remaining clothing as he waited and doing his best to appear desirable for when Koichi returned with protection. Why else would he have suddenly gone? Sure enough less than a minute Koichi returned, condoms and a small container in hand. “Sorry, I didn't realise I'd be comforting you like this.”

“I didn't expect to want to go this far,” MiA admitted, “Not that I'm saying no now.”

“I can see that,” Koichi agreed as he removed his last clothes and crawled onto the bed, “You're so big and hard, is that for me? You want me to lick it, just like a lollipop? Salty instead of sweet, but I don't mind. Not when it's you.”

“How can you sound sweet when saying such filthy things?” MiA teased, letting out a happy moan as Koichi's tongue ran up his length from base to tip. He'd really meant he wanted to lick him all over then. He'd never really doubted that Koichi hadn't. Content, he settled back to enjoy the other's mouth, picking up the container that lay on the bed. Lubricant for anal pleasure. He hadn't thought of that but it made sense that Koichi would want to make everything pleasurable for the both of them. So kind and considerate. So wickedly good with his tongue.

“As I thought,” Koichi said with a playful lick of his lips, “You're going to taste so good when you cum. Do you want me to suck now? Fill my mouth with this delicious hot flesh?”

“Oh yes,” MiA moaned, excited by what was on offer. He'd seen this a few times in videos, his search history not as innocent as it might appear. He knew how much the men receiving oral pleasure seemed to enjoy the act, but what really enticed him was the thought of having a man willing to do this for him. Koichi was pleasing him willingly, clearly happy to have his mouth sliding down another man's length. He wanted this as much as MiA did and was taking control, which was something MiA hadn't seen in videos. It was an act nothing like what he had thought and he was grateful. The reality was so much nicer than taking advantage of another for your own pleasure.

“My pink haired angel,” MiA encouraged as he ran his fingers through Koichi's hair, careful not to hold him down or appear to be doing so. He wanted everything to be entirely Koichi's decision. “Will you look after me here?”

“Always,” Koichi promised as he smiled up at MiA, “I told you I was your guide.”

“So you did,” MiA agreed, moaning as Koichi's mouth returned to his sensitive flesh. He needed release, but he didn't want this moment to be over so he held back, keeping his pleasure at bay until it became too much. “I can't hold back.”

“Don't,” Koichi ordered, actually laughing when cum hit his lower jaw. He swiped some off on his finger, savouring it with his tongue before offering MiA a taste.

“I don't think so,” MiA said as he rejected Koichi's offer. Tasting cum wasn't something he was quite ready for. As considerate as Koichi was, he seemed to understand that without question.

“Fine,” Koichi reassured him as he picked up the lube, “All the more for my eager tongue.”

“You're like a baby,” MiA teased, “You just want to put everything in your mouth.”

“Pretty much,” Koichi agreed as he coated his finger with lube. “Especially if it belongs to you.”

“Oh that's right,” MiA remembered, “You're a thief who takes what he wants.”

“Because why ask?” Koichi replied, his finger slipping between MiA's legs and into his body as he spoke. Having never had anyone pleasure him like this before, it took MiA a moment to get used to having anything enter him like this. He quickly decided it was enjoyable and relaxed, spreading his legs further to give Koichi more access. This felt good, no it felt amazing, he realised as Koichi's fingers found a sensitive spot deep inside. He'd always known he liked men. Had always known but never thought about what that meant. Sexuality wasn't part of his ordered life but it was clearly going to become a huge part of this chaotic one.

“You feel so good inside me,” MiA confessed, unable to keep the blush from his cheeks. It was a little embarrassing to admit. He had never felt so vulnerable and would have never put himself in this position with a man he didn't trust.

“I know,” Koichi replied with a smile, “It's addictive too but I'm almost always up for this.”

“Then I'll remember to come to you,” MiA promised and accepted Koichi's kiss easily, not at all surprised to realise this was a distraction for the second finger sliding inside him. He was being stretched now and knew that this was good. He didn't want it to hurt when Koichi filled him, he wanted it to be an act of love.

“You already have,” Koichi teased, “Remember? I told you it tasted good?”

“Something like that,” MiA agreed as he kissed Koichi again. He just couldn't get enough of this man, hadn't even realised just how much he needed to keep him by his side. Koichi wouldn't hurt him, not mentally, emotionally or physically. With this pink haired angel he knew he was safe.

A third finger slid inside him and he held Koichi, relieved to find there was no pain. Just pleasure, growing in intensity and making him horny all over again. He knew exactly what he wanted, what he needed, but he couldn't ask. He didn't have to, Koichi already knew.

Kissing MiA lightly on the forehead Koichi quickly covered his aroused length with a condom. For a moment he paused, reading MiA's facial expression to make sure he really wanted this. He didn't want to be seen as taking advantage of MiA. He just wanted to make him feel good. Deciding that MiA knew exactly what they were doing, he gently penetrated the other, sliding in slowly as he filled him, kissing him all the while because his mouth would never be able to get over the taste of those lips.

“You feel so good,” MiA moaned, no longer caring what Koichi thought of his eagerness to do this. It was only fair that his partner knew just how much he was enjoying it.

“So do you,” Koichi replied, kissing MiA gently as he began to pick up his pace. “I'm proud to be your first.”

“Who says I'm a virgin?” MiA teased, though he knew Koichi would know the truth. He'd been a soldier too, shared a past that told him much of who Koichi had once been. The majority of their lives had been the same, it was only by embracing Chaos that they could be different. Chaos would form his personality quickly but it would be affection that kept him sane.

“Well no one can call you a virgin now,” Koichi answered as his lips joined MiA's once more. “Not now I've taken you as mine.”

“Have you now?” MiA teased as he moaned softly, “Very well, I'll be yours.”

“Like you ever had a choice,” Koichi replied, moving faster now, working up to a climax that he had desired from the moment he had first met the soldier before him now. He always knew what he wanted, but this time he had been lucky to get it. Order had almost stolen this moment from him. Thank the Messiah that Chaos had won in the end.

 


End file.
